Saturday, June 21, 2008

Primate Hunt

The topic of marriage comes up quite often these days...people in my age group are getting married...parents keep indicating that it is an imminent thing (imminent = two year time frame according to them)...and i keep wondering...

I have been on the hunt for a partner ever since i can remember...though not entirely in romantic terms...in school i used to seriously miss having a good debating partner...there were plenty of good award winning debaters around...but unfortunately i was looking for someone who would focus more on fun and experimentation than winning...

The i have been looking for a gang of frnz who like everything from chess to poker to treks to drama...continuing on the theme of fun and experimentation...and mostly that gang also exists in parts only

So now i wonder...a romantic dreamer like me...it seems that i have been waiting for my swan (there is a significance to drawing analogy with swans, i hope the readers of this blog do know it) since i was born (guilty of over exaggeration)...and yet my worry is the same...fun and experimentative...does she exist...and if yes will our paths ever cross...

Moving on from my personal quandary to a more general view to the whole mate hunt thing...and dissecting it like an engineer there are various aspects to a person that we judge them on...looks, physique, family background, education, goals in life, views on life, habits, blah blah blah...not only do both the parties have to judge the other on each of these they have to be able to find out about each of these...and most aspects here are those that don't show up early...

Neways so given that is humanely inane trying to do all this maths...lets simplify it to a single dimension...do we click or do we not click...the aggregate of all the above is the intuitive feeling whether we click or not...though when it gets time to put a definitive yes or no to that question most people find themselves horribly confused...after all its a very long term bet one is making...a call option of that long is unheard of in business :P

And then for those of us who look at other couples and wonder how in the name of god did they find each other...i have been through three relationships myself and all special yet none supposing a chance close to the "i do" point...so i still wonder.

And those of you who have read my scrap on principles of seduction would prolly agree that given the opportunities there is much one can do...but for those of us who when most people meet say by their fifth interaction that you stand out a wee bit too much from the crowd (not in the same sense as stars stand out from the crowd)...there is always a dearth of opportunities...for out there is a girl...who one day quit her job and went backpacking for two months...who embodies the free spirit and the quintessential tag of homely (courtesy indian matrimonial ads if you've ever read that column quite interesting stuff there) an oxymoron in itself...infact it sounds interesting to make this a list of oxymorons...petitely strong...wheatishly glowing...conservatively kinky....spiritually humane...wierdly humorous...ambitiously familial ( i am sure i wud be jammed for wrong usage but i try to imply a family person with the second word)...femininstically logical (refer to the men from mars females from venus argument)...i wont complete the list of oxymorons am sure a whole lot of will get added to the list in the comments section...

so as i was saying...if you do ever find her...please claim an eclairs from me and do point her in this direction...till then i'll get busy with work and try and get that song out of my head "i'm so lonely...i've got nobaady to call my own" sung in the very endearing chipmunk tone...

10 comments:

Keshi said...

ty for stopping by my online Living Room ;-)

Cute post here. U wont believe it..my 'hunt' is pretty much like ur's and hey I hv blogged abt it quite often. Not this sweetly tho LOL! Read my recent post 'No BOYS Please' written on June 10th. Scroll down my blog n u'll see it.



**...i have been through three relationships myself and all special yet none supposing a chance close to the "i do" point...so i still wonder

I still wonder too...


Keshi.

DewdropDream said...

What? haven't you signed up on all those matrimonial sites yet??!!! Gimme your details, my family has plenty of match-makers and they'd be only too glad to help you out :D

I'm not entirely sure how one can conclude if a relationship is not special (Don't have much experience in the matter) but I've always believed that being too rigid about the things you want from a partner will undermine anything special you might already have. Also, knowing what you can offer to another person is more important than knowing what you're expecting from them... and most of all, every relationship is a gamble... you DID talk about taking risks, maybe this is your chance :)

Keshi said...

btw I just wrote a post on Dating...check it out when u hv time :)

Keshi.

Keshi said...

read my last reply to ya in my blog :)

Keshi.

Benaam Badnaam said...

@dewdropdream...yes infact that was my stipulation to my family tht before they ever expect me to say yes....i would want to be able to say yes i can keep this girl happy with that view being first concurred on by her...

btw...what chance is being mentioned here??? looks blank

ravisha said...

thanks for stopping by...
reading this made me go back to the days wen i was searching for Mr.Right..it was long long time ago (i know that sounds really lame) but i still remember the fluttering of my heart whenever i saw somebody remotely cute and I MISS IT! so dont count on being too happy when you find Miss She-is-everything-i-ever-dreamt-off and make most of your time as a singleton..you'll miss it. god knows I do!!

DewdropDream said...

I meant, you want to take risks then there's no better chance to be had than to plunge into a relationships.. they're all... not quite risky, but even the most tame ones bring such unexpected challenges...

Benaam Badnaam said...

@Ravisha...i've been in and out...so have both views of the world...between work and tennis i am quite packed up...but there are moments...especially near weekends when one misses being in a relationship...all in good time as they say....

Glad to know u've found ure mr. right :)

@Dewdrop...aah but the quirk is not a fear of relationship...from a swan's standards i have had one too many :P ...the issue is finding 'my kind of person' to have it with....and if u will hop onto Keshi's blog on dating (June 10) you'll see quite a long call we had on that topic...the my kind of person...tuff to find :P

Macadamia The Nut said...

Lol!
I'll keep an eye out for her
:D

Benaam Badnaam said...

@macadamia....aapka bahut bahut dhanbaad :P