hope and hopelessness of love, drugs and meditation

3:38 PM me: haan to question yeh thaa breaking our truce...if u don't believe in real life romance...r u intending to get married....?

3:39 PM Seema: right now.. NO
i dont know if i'd change my mind

3:40 PM me: not right now but if u don't believe in love as a possibility...then what would be the reason for u to get married
matbal like if u thought there was no good ending possible to that story or ne other story to phir why...even 5 yrs downt he line why (the story referred to is ‘what men want’ can be found in my stories blog callmesmith.blogspot.com , the issue being her firm stance that the ending in the story is only partial and I real life it would only go on further to be a heartbreak)
3:41 PM Seema: i said NO
i dont think i wanna get married ever
thats wt i think right now

3:42 PM me: ok so now next question...if u don't believe in love and hence see no reason to get married...what abt sex....u in for it, against it...watz ure stand on that

3:43 PM Seema: right now m figurin out if i shud continue in this college another year
sex is not exactly on my mind u c

3:44 PM me: or drop it and join air hostess course...i think they have a minimum height reqt...

Seema: i was thinkin i cud abandon material world
go to some ashram
have charas everyday

me: charas costs money btw

Seema: n pray
its almost free in a few places
3:45 PM rishikesh
water'd cost u more
its like a charas-ganja haven

me: really like where...kulu hills also they will make u pay
the whole biz of drugs runs on money
really u ever got some..or know someone who gets it for free

Seema: its diff in rishikesh
3:46 PM these babas they got loads on em
money aint a problem

me: babas get a lot of money also btw

Seema: they just need followers to keep it goin for em

me: yes i can imagine u naked wid ash on ure body smokign charas....yes the whole picture looks very clear

3:47 PM Seema: disgustin gilli
we talkin sanyaas

me: :P

Seema: n dope
u dont respect anythin do u?

me: sanyas has got nothing to do wid dope...ure jst talking dope

Seema: it does

me: i respect thought

Seema: u havent seen a lot of ashrams
3:48 PM its easier to meditate
wen high
u can lose ur self
materially
otherwise its very difficult

me: i have a religious guru...an actual religious guru...if u've ever heard of birla ghat and taat waale babaji in haridwar

Seema: think i have
3:49 PM all my life i have only heard of babajis

me: i heard them talking abt the virtues of milk, of excercise of meditation of bhakti...never of charas

3:50 PM Seema: my dad visits this guy.. guru.. he doesnt talk food.. milk/dope/whatever
stays away from crowds
upon a hill smwr
3:51 PM u'd have to trek to reach him
seems like a genuine guy
no money.. no followers
he cares a damn

3:52 PM me: yes now that is how i wud describe an ascetic...dope isn't included

Seema: hmm

me: there are dopeys too i agree
but in them

Seema: i havent quite reached that level u know

me: i agree with the aghoris
they dope and all

Seema: ya

me: followers of shiva

3:53 PM but their complete philosophy is that nothing in god's creation is disgusting or to be despised
they live in sewers...
wear ash
dope
one of their rituals include consumptuon of meat of dead human

3:54 PM Seema: ya i know

me: ....

Seema: they eat in a skull

me: they i agree wid..

Seema: i dont see myself doin that

me: but meditation and dope don't go...

Seema: even if i think its kinda okay

me: u either dope or u meditate

Seema: u know they do
3:55 PM kinda do
u can meditate however u like

me: one lets the mind wander to thoughtlessness, other concentrates the mind to thoughtlessness

Seema: u just need that state of mind
doesnt matter what takes u there

me: ya but like u can't mix allopathic and homeopathic
same way u can't mix the other two

3:56 PM Seema: see it is more about the end result
to most ppl
u r right it'd not b the same
but i see no harm in startin off like tht

me: haan but u can't take a two horse horse cart...make one turn left other turn right and still hope to move

Seema: only that there are no two horses

3:57 PM me: yes experimenting is not bad...though if u get caught like jim morrison...
then u end up sad and dead in bath tub

Seema: who decides wts wrong n wts not
its wrong wen u know that it is n u still do it

3:58 PM me: not saying nething is wrong...lots of ppl who try meditating wud never reach newhere...

Seema: otherwise it is all hypothetical

me: and ppl who dope maybe happy

Seema: ethics n moral codes n all

me: but the reverse is also possible
i dont talk abt ethics and morals

Seema: anythin is possible
thats y i say its the state of mind that is more important

me: my only ethic/moral/principal is to never hurt nebody or think ill of nebody
other than that u know i have no prinicples

Seema: diff ppl have diff reasons to dope
3:59 PM depends on wt i think principles are
i dont think anything is wrong as long as u not harmin a second person
do wtever u will to urself
ur life

me: we seem to be on similar lines there

4:00 PM Seema: hmm
thats how it shud b u know
with everyone
life'd b so much simpler

me: yeah there's this kid ...met online..she's in xaviers...
4:02 PM now she and her gang members watch porn...rag juniors including guys in kinda sexual manners , will hang out wid guys..but she won't jerk off or have sex or even kiss any guy...coz in her mind as long she doenst do that she's decent !!!!
and like she's majorly fixed on porn and i was like kiddo..the day u started thinking..decency flew out of the window...:P
:P
4:03 PM neways each to theirs

Seema: ya
if she thinks she's right
then be it

4:04 PM i hate ppl who r guilty
cmon dont do it
as simple as that
me: yeah...
4:05 PM if i ever manage to organize 'the naked mile' run in india will send u an invite...
:)

Seema: hahaha

4:06 PM but wt wud b the objective

me: what has always been the objective...to break rules
rules the anithema of mankind
prevent development

4:07 PM Seema: hmm
but y wud u break rules without any objective n just for the heck of it

4:08 PM me: because just the act of breaking rules proclaims that we are free as humans, ppl of free thought, ppl who will ask questions...
4:09 PM ppl who will not be cowered down by shiv sena or the govt...

Seema: but y cant ppl do that wen there is a reason

me: the only thing we will not do is harm, others

Seema: most of these naked mile athletes wud bak off then

me: yeah thats there too...

Seema: hypocrisy...

4:10 PM me: not exactly chains....
everybody has chains
some manage to break free some don't

4:11 PM Seema: but i just think ppl have gotta b sure of et they blv in

me: i wouldn't sit in judgement upon those who cant

Seema: know its not as simple as it sounds
but they shud try

4:12 PM me: shud...who knows may be they have also...but like u don't seem keen to try meditating withiout dope they might not want to try revolting by leaving money or career etc
lots of desires and fears govern us...

and thats where this conversation petered off due to other engagements....leave u all to ure own thoughts on this...