What if

What if, when u finally got free from work..u called but no one answered...what if the choice had been simple but...u were late

As the year ends...i urge you to take a pause...and wonder what your priorities are in life...

for most things that we take for granted are the ones we care about most...but realize it only when they are gone...but then u can do nothing about it

pause now...take a look...for most of us our lives aren't ruined by a terrorist from outside...most families get destroyed by themselves

Praying for happiness for each one of you wonderful people out there...

may god be with u...happy new year :)

if only i couldn't write this post

heading towards my friends reception in goregaon...the auto wallah got challaned by the police for jumping a red light (no i hadn't asked him to)...which surprisingly made him drive even more rash...

and no i didnt stop him...infact i hoped that at one of his dangerous maneuvers he would misjudge the breaks or somebody else would not react in time enough

and i wouldn't have to write this post

no i'm not contemplating suicide...this ain't hero heeralal
let me put it this way if i were in a hold up
i would fight the robber cause that's the correct thing to do
fight against injustice
but if he managed to pull a gun on me and press the trigger...
i wouldn't dodge the bullet

every day people get up and well some of them have something to look forward to
i don't...
i don't find diwali joyful
i could really count the number of times in the year that i have laughed
i am those of the generation who are lost
i exist for the responsibilities i have...

of a man in debt (education loan)
of a son
of existence (having consumed the world's resources for 26 years)

i must repay my debt...so that i can be a free person...unbound and unjudgeable

funnily u know there are drugs that can stop these thoughts...i know since i've taken them at one point of time...legally

but i don't want to...cause these thoughts are what make me...

the best murder mystery and i am hoping at least this is something i am first at...
is where the author...plots his own death

Happy new year everyone...see u on the other side


(p.s. don't get hyper...like i said i'm not doing a hero heeralal)

a bit of conversation

Lumin: i dont usually put my picture to any of my profiles btw.. :P

MystiqueW: how scared are u of the world

Lumin: :P
i am not worried about the world.... :P

MystiqueW: but u r afraid of it

Lumin: why???

MystiqueW: well ask ureself...why do u never put ure foto up on any of ure profiles

Lumin: because i dont do that....

MystiqueW: we know the 'what'...its the 'why' thats more interesting

Lumin: htat's your new status msg..... :P

MystiqueW: i thought it was interesting enuf for tht

Lumin: :)
good... :P

MystiqueW: that doesnt mean u can skip the question

Lumin: :P well....
i am much of a back stage person.. i dont like coming on stage... i like doing the things like directing or creating etc....

MystiqueW: have u seen a flower?

Lumin: yup.. why??

MystiqueW: u see how it has petals outside
and deep inside is the stemen...with the seeds\\

Lumin: yup...

MystiqueW: logic is like that...
u start with statements
and then u question those
till u reach the depth

Lumin: hm.. i dont get your point...

MystiqueW: so ure first reaction to my why is like the outermost petals of the flower
u must keep questioning those
to know ureself better
like why do u like to be back stage
and then another why
and then another

Lumin: :) hm... nice...

MystiqueW: another name for truth is silence...when there are no more questions left
its also called meditation

Lumin: and i got a why too... :P why does that interest you???
ok...
MystiqueW: why does this world interest me?
its a beautiful piece of art...which i'm a part off
i'm just trying to appreciate it better

Lumin: :) ok.. that's very poetic.. :)

MystiqueW: :)

Lumin: :)

Lumin is one of the many people i meet randomly on the net and end up talking too

duur hai tu

koi toh wajah hogee ki tu abhi tak mere aahosh mein naee
koi toh wajah hogee ki tu phir chup sahee

ae khuda, ab kya tujhe paane ke liye
khudaa se hi baat karni padegi

A deeper sound

even at this 'grown up' age
there are times when i feel
helpless and lost
when my strengths seem missing
and my weaknesses are playing their cards
in those moments of agony
i look forward to hearing a sound
a sound that will tell me everythings gonna be ok
and even though i have never heard that sound
i have felt u do things for me
and said here is the chance u had asked me for
now show me what u can do and make me proud
and though i have faltered almost everytime
even on those
it seems you haven't given up on me
thanks for being the confidence i dont have
thanks for being the deeper sound that i can't hear

addendum

..."i miss u"...three words from her...three words i've been waiting to hear for weeks now...all it took to put me out of misery...

we spend our live times thinking about work, about world, about the bills we are going to pay...but the one thing what matters the most to us...our happiness...we take for granted...whilst that is what should get a fair share of attention...make the people who make u happy...happy...after all its their smile which will be seen on ure lips

of tales of love

i'm angry...

i'm angry with life

its one thing to not be able to meet someone u like

its another to meet someone who has already found somebody before u met them

but what do u do...when u find somebody u really care for...but they won't let u in...and they won't care back...

i don't know when was the last time i was pissed...or probably i've been pissed the last few weeks...but i havent let it all out...

i am more so angry because its not like she's happy and i'm just butting into her life...she won't let happiness come to her...and then she cribs as to why she's sad...

it reminds me of the whole story of the drowning guy who refuses to board a boat coming out of nowhere coz he says god will save him...and then when he dies and asks god why didnt he save him...he says dude...who do u think sent the boat

i'm angry because she was probably my boat...and while it seemed she was coming to rescue me...it seems she was just floating nearby and i had just raised my hopes up...

i'm angry because i think of her all the time...and i mean all the time...but i cant see her thinking abt me...

i'm angry because its not a toy that a bully has taken who i can fight with to get mine back...

i just hope that its because she doesnt like something in me...that way atleast there's a reason i can understand

i'm just angry now...very very angry...

and sad...and heartbroken...

my love affair...

I haven't been with her for long
but ours is a bond unbroken
she keeps busy with her day to day life
but i know she years for me everyday
as i yearn for her
and when we occassionally catch up
she flirts with me as she did when we first met
playing it subtle at moments
or roaring for my attention
a soothing voice in either tone
she talks to me and wonders
that didn't i miss her...what took me so long
her smooth surface is eager to rub againt mine
she is a demanding one
whilst she cuddles me in the evening and does general chatter
in the mornings she wants me pumping and sweating
and tired i fall in her lap
and i realize how much i love her
how much she loves me
there is happiness and peace
and not that we dont fight
oh sometimes she grows dark and angry
she scares me when she's so fiery
but i know beneath all that rage
is a woman who wants to be loved
and of all the girls i have known
she's the one i think simplest to understand
her wants are primial and on the face
her love is easily felt
its a three year old love affair
and it still continues...

after months i came back to juhu beach
and my babe was as lovely as ever infact i think she looks better than last time, there's a mini garden also there now :)

life is a bitch

not that i havent said this before...

but this time...i can prove it

till about a month and a half back...

i had seemed to have found the girl i had been waiting for all my life...my swan...
job was going okish...the only piece of the jigsaw which seemed to need a little working
and by the next month's pay my bank balance would have been positive enough to give that basic level of comfort where you feel you can afford an expensive drink without having to think twice about it.

And then there is today

The girl is lost in her own world, her own conflicts...between her world and mine...there is but just a mumbling of words sometimes...i have no idea wats playing on her mind and heart...and i doubt she knows watz on in mine

The entrepreneurial venture bro was in...has shut down and the bad economy means till about three months back the people who were willing to pay double his wages...don't even have an opening...which also means that we are in a precarious situation given the high home loan emi which has to go out each month...and all our resources need to be pooled in to ride out the drought...

And granpa passed away last week...which hath brought with itself much grief and other issues...

Funny how in a month the tide can change so bad...u think that now finally the jigsaw is going to solve and u find somebody messes the pieces up all again...and u wonder whether its all in vain...whether it will ever solve...whether there will be a time u will say hey life's good now

but whoever's messing up my jigsaw...if they think that one day i'm gonna give in...well they don't know the khukhraan blood in me...i will fight the battle...i like the taste of blood...and i will either win or go down fighting...u keep trying to mess up the jigsaw...i will find ways to solve it...

gud luc to u...life...gud luc to u

a little bit of maths...a little bit of life

ok this issue of unhappy people, couples and families has been bugging me lately...And like for most things i take the help of my dear friends Maths and Logic to help shed some light on these.

And hence today we call upon Mr. Parreto and his law to help us out albeit with some modifications. For those uninitated the Parreto law says that 80% of things can be attributed to 20% of the causes. The figure can vary the 80:20 is not a etched in stone figure...its more about the spirit than the word.

So lets start with the diagnosis. How does one label oneself or a relationship happy. If for 80% of the time you are happy, happy wid your partner, having happy conversations with your family...then you are well...happy. The question you will be asking is how do i measure it...well one day spend some time observing your conversation or the conversations happening in your family, if they are lighthearted banter, serious banter, anger, disputes etc etc. Repeat this three or four days with gaps inbetween...it should throw up some light on your state...

So the next question is what if one is not happy (if u r happy then well move to another post...or come claim ure eclairs from me :) )...well then here is where the parreto and his law really comes into use...most of your troubles according to this law would be coming from a few couple of things...

I will not be addressing the breadth of issues that could possible plague u...but just one...taking life too seriously...most of the things we are serious about...in the long game of life...are actually trivialities...in school it was what if i fail, what if i don't get through iit jee, what if i am not selected in the school team, not to forget the horrid times girls went through over pimples...when you grow up the ever increasing peer pressure, the whole thing about feeding ones family, building a home, job, boss, pay raises, expectations of relatives, expectations of society.............if you let things bugger u down...they will bugger u down...if u try...u can take the burden of the atlas on your shoulders...but really the atlas will survive even if u didn't...it did so before u came on earth and after u leave...

Ok i'll help with another one...a quickie...fights...most people fight...because they don't listen and they don't try and put themselves in the other person's shoes...

So why am i preaching all this...well cause this is what i try and live by...and because bhai and bhabhi have been at each others necks for a few days now... :P

and i don't like ppl being unhappy...smile...spread miles of smiles...

(btw it ain't easy...going thru a lot of heartburn on many accounts these days...then i remind myself...eno khaao kaam pe chalo :)

smile ppl...we are god's painting...lets make it beautiful

give in, into love

love isn't as simple as it sounds...and quite often it doesnt get the priority it shud...these are my tears...when i see the world this way

when warmth is all that you want
and they try and barter you the world
when a hug is all you need
the world doesnt work...a single person is wat goes

when time flies
round and round and thoughts get entangled
and u find that u r tired of it all
that what came to u at the end...is what should've been there all along

when love is all that i want
why do u think anything else will work
i need someone who will give me the attention
when it requires u to lose...why are u still hung up on being in control

http://catastrophonix.blogspot.com/2008/12/give-in-into-love.html

bye bye granpa

night before yesterday granpa began his journey into the next dimension

a wake up call at 3 a.m. jolted me awake into looking back and also looking forward...and somehow both are not an easy thing to do...

unlike granma whose love comes out in cribs...granpa's love came out as pampering...ever since we were youngsters who treaded through granma's vegetable garden all i can ever remember is granpa pampering us..ofcourse in his style...which meant...being treated to goats milk as well :P ...though what i remember most of my trips to ddun as a child was sleeping with grandpa in his huge bed and he would tell me stories (bro was 4 years elder..so he had kinda outgrown that age

he was working till about a month back...at 93 thats an achievement...work was his life...or as he would call his office...kopbhawan :P

mom tells me he was fond of animals...which doesn't translate into a dog btw...it means at different times he had a goat,a monkey, a cat, and a parrot...that is so ultracool...

he was also a fighter...i think he cleared his bar in the 3rd attempt...and he had been fighting various illnesses that have been plaguing him for years now...

when i look forward to my death...i don't wanna go this way in a hospital or a bed...creeping away...i'd want to go one of the following ways... 1. praying and meditating 2. out travelling across the world 3. partying 4. riddled with bullets or lathis while fighting for a cause right in the middle of a road...and once i'm gone i want a huge party thrown...i dont want to give a reception on my marriage but i want a huge one when i'm gone...death i believe is a celebration...of a succesful life and the beginning of a new journey...while we may miss the people who leave us...let us remember them with a tear in the eye and a smile on our lips...lets raise a toast to the champions who have left us...bye bye granpa...you are now one with god :)

my election manifesto

A lot of people are praying in silence, some are wearing white shirts, or ribbons or lighting candles...thats not me...this is my way of paying my respects to those who passed away...this is what i want to do... I don't know if i will ever be able to...probably in that sense the people lighting the candles are more action oriented...but this is me...this is my tribute...my dedication...my election manifesto...the first draft from an airport lounge so please forgive its crudeness or lack of detail...and please help add to it

1. The War against unrest (internal and external):
a. Education: Build new schools especially in naxalite or terrorist prone areas, strengthen the existing structure with focus on teacher development
b. Employment opportunities: Investment in
i. Rural infrastructure building: (sanitation, electrification, water, teaching)
ii. Environment development and green tourism: re-green-ification, re-hydration, heritage maintenance
c. Security
i. Police: making police force independent of the state political machinery similar in structure to the armed forces
ii. Investing in advanced equipment for both armed forces and police
2. Governance
a. Corruption: Strengthening CAD (comptroller auditor general) to develop an audit system for all transaction based roles
b. One India ID: Integrate the pan card and voter id into one common id to be used consistently across India to identify people.
c. B-plan based system: All annual planning to be based on a b-plan(with social, economic returns) based systems including setting KRAs top down.
d. Regulations:
i. Gambling: Legalizing and regulating gambling and ensuring all operators are registered.
ii. Prostitution: Similarly legalizing and regulating prostitution
1. Strict norms of operation
2. Program to provide rehabilitation options to existing sex-workers
3. Making child trafficking a crime punishable by death
3. Equality
a. Opportunity provisions: Changing over from the reservation based system to equal opportunity, providing opportunities to the underprivileged ones to develop as well as the privileged ones.

so now what

there were blasts in the train

there were blasts in the market

this time they found spraying bullets more convenient...

Does the carnage stop here...or will be the people sitting in the lawns of India gate next, name your city and i guess between all of us we could come up with plans of how to attack it...not to say the terrorists would do a better job of it...

I have many a critique of how this whole incident was handled...but that would be side lining the point...the veneer of isolation...the silo we put ourselves in...the feeling of safety has for a large part been shattered pretty soundly...the next time our family and friends step out into the city...we will wonder if we will see them again...

And angry as we may be...bombs and guns are no solution to the problem...donkeys of year later and billions of dollars down US has only shot itself in the foot in its so called war against terrorism...

Not that when gunz are blazing u use roses...(although Gandhi would suggest that and i quite agree with him...but that method it takes a strong will to sacrifice self and near and dear ones which i dont believe we yet have...) but the problem doesnt get solved by killing a terrorist...the problem will only get solved when lil sweet kids...dont grow up to become the faces of terror...

I would say...read 'three cups of tea' ...its an insight of Pakistan by an American and once you've read it you'll understand why i asked u to read it

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

about where and why i disappeared and other such questions...lets just say...my life...my experiments with it :P

wishing u miles of smiles

diwali greetings all ye merrymen...i wish u miles of smiles

there are more strangers on this earth than i'm comfortable with...there are more people who are strangers to each other than i feel comfortable about...miles of smiles is one interconnected chain of happiness...and for this diwali...i wish that you get to know your neighbours better...i wish u miles of smiles...

this is also a semi-farewell kind of a thing...kind of a last post thing and though i would like to make a melodramatic speach like sharukh khan...but i shall desist from his copyrighted style...and just say its been a pleasure being around...learning, unlearning, joking and fighting (ok discussing)

i shall still be around on messenger...and prolly some day back here too...till then

aufwiederzehn

and thanks for the fish

simplify

for those who have ever tried solving a nuclear equation would realize that therein physics takes a cruel turn...of variables too many to fathom by visualization. And since even the greatest of scientist are but borne of humans like we are...they also get stumped by such complexities...

So they do what most people with simpler problems dont...they simplify...they work on one variable at a time holding everything else constant.

Our life is full of issues...we are lucky if the issues end up being as trivial as stuck in the wrong career or messed up in love...some people end up going through cancer and aids and i feel those are the kind of challenges which really i wouldnt wish on my enemy also...

But being happy...is quite a challenge...for its a summation of many choices we make...the problem usually arises because we don't consciously make most of those choices...and that we try and tackle too many variables at one go...

life's happiness usually doesn't rely on the big things we do...though when we define happiness we usually talk about the things we are going to do probably once in a month or once a year.

We don't meditate enough on what is happiness for us, hence we keep running around...taking in little stimulations at a time and hoping that is it..that is what happiness means...

i could probably tell you what happiness is...but the issue is...its not about the answer....its the question that will set you free....and secondly since i'm also still on the journey it would be unfair to talk like a saint (though prolly i'm just 13 months away from it sainthood)

being weak

the world often sees u, for you for your strengths...and that why is u require a person close to u...is for them to be able to see you for your weaknesses and become your pillars of support...

that is why you need that special to be there, cause you can't let yourself be vulnerable infront of many...it takes a great deal of trust to be totally naked...

it takes a great deal of love and sacrifice to become the blanket of warmth for someone...

Leaving terra firma

I've always wondered how it would be if the characters in my book world came alive, how if life became a mix of what is and what i dream of.

How reality becomes a blurred concept...and how maybe i could probably talk to my characters, thank them for what i've learnt from them and talk to them and explain the future I chose for them.

Authors must live a life close to insanity...it is when you go beyond exists...that you enter the world of magic and magicians...

bhajan keertan

yashomati maeeyaan se boling nand laalaa
why radha goree why me kaalaa

telling smiling maeeyaan
kohl eyed dudette in jaddoo aisaa daala
thats why you so kaalaa


:P :P

ek kalam ki sookhi syaahi

bade saalon pehle ek pyaari si ladki meri zindagi mein aaee thi...i was happily playing about...going to school...when she moved in next door...One find day..just like that...

Just passed out of college, all confident, a job with a top firm, a big bungalow rented on her own salary...

Though our first encounter was quite the anti climax...a smart assy comment she made...a bet i took up...changing her wild bush of a lawn into better than my own mom's in less than three months...

And in those three months we became pals...buddies...chuddy buddies...She used to walk into our home at any time, from the morning pooja to the dinner...un announced like it was her only...and I could do stay overs at her place any day...we would stay up late to watch movies together...we saw the whole of Hannibal Lecter series in one night...

Heck we even used to go on dates together...we had so much fun...she knew the bouncers at this pub so I was the only kid of my age who managed to get an entry into a disc...

That was 8th class...she was 21...

One day she asked me what will you do when you grow up...i looked up from my computer and told her i'm gonna be an engineer...build autos...better than dad does...

She smiled...no i think she laughed...she ruffled her hand through my hair...and said...i think you'll make a fine gardner...

that was 10th class...

One day she introduced me to this guy, and by the look in his eyes I knew she had found her man. They were still dating when I left for college to Pune.

She used to write to me every week, i preferred letters to phone, i've never liked phones. She married him, I finally met her family. She was looking regal that day.

I was working in Pune those days

Then one day the good news, she was pregnant. I knew that was what she had wanted the most in her life. I had been her kid for many years and now I was glad she was getting to do, getting to be what she had always wanted to be...a mom.

And then the call, there's always this call that you get once in your life that turn your world upside down. She told me, somehow you know I expected that call, I had been expecting that call since the day I first saw her in my house, standing in that blue salwaar kameez with small white floral print in her cute little white sandals...I knew that day that she would go away, that she didn't belong to this earth...

I took the next flight out back to Delhi. For the next month he and I took care of her. She delivered a fine little baby on 3rd March. Funnily she handed her over to me, that little bundle of joy. On the night of 3rd she went back to where she had come from.

He, me and the little her took off to his farmhouse near Chandigarh. He never remarried, I never married...when you've been touched by perfection, you don't somehow require anything more...ever. Our little bundle of joy is now a fin little lass of 5, as peppy and mischevious as her mom.

I'm still a software engineer but only by hobby...three landscape artist awards later, one wonders, why was god so kind on us to pay a visit in person

Quick musings

Though you may all know the govt is an ass (and by govt i mean politicians) but i feel like exemplifying two cases before u:

1. The nuclear deal

Pokhran 2 was way back so many years way back that i dont remember the year
We dont have enough nuclear fuel for our exisitng plants, never did never will
so..the nuclear deal wid did this year, could've been done 5 years ago and by today we would be energy surplus...imagine no power cuts and at barely 3 bucks (compared to 11 u pay for ure colony's generator and i guess 5 for state electricity)

2. America has the SSN social security number, a nice thing which identifies each person uniquely. We have the pan number, the driving license number, the voter id number and yet if you ever try and identify who a particular piece of land belongs too you'll be shocked how less the government knows about the person...and much less if the person takes to crime


Did i tell u guys by 35 i wanna quit making money and dive into politics....

General Updates

Vroom's Log Oct 18

Pundit say 3 yrs atleast...Vroom agrees...Vroom has got into his hunter mode...a la James Bond style...

Btw Vroom came across highly interesting ladies...a missy from singapore, a missy whose married at 19, and a missy who is a shoe fetishist (right down to her pen name) and has a beautiful way wid words...there's also a chap who writes the MUS blog...but then we dont much talk abt chaps here now...tht wouldnt be gossipingly interesting enuf :P

11 Months and still no action...13 more months and u can officially count me as a saint...(all due respects to the church)

Economy...

read the newspapers but dont go influenced by what the ppl say including Buffet...go for logic...look for numerical indicators...to see if the world is going up or down

Work...

New project...very interesting....but pressed for time....shall be visiting quite a few places in this regard...mumbai is definitely up so is hyderabad...unfortunately Pune is not

Health

gymming has been down for a while now...been getting nice food and sweets lately...


Travel

visited ddun recently...granparens house....taught cousin sis to ride her honda pleasure...kiddo was happy :)....bloggers from ddun ping in plz...I'm thinking of a pan India calendar of travel...

Nov marriage visit to frnz wedding in jamshedpur might be off...not sure getting leave then...plus sudden demands on cash seem to be coming up...best to keep a wait and watch attitude

Fun...

prolly meeting up wid frnz tonite for drinks at club...will have to wait till ppl wake up :P

Lifestyle change

Somehow feel very carefree in the world... :)

One rode past the cuckoo's nest

[Knocking on the door]

'The store's closed'

'Yes I know but I'm not here to really buy anything. I was just hoping to share a cup of coffee. Look I even brought the coffee '

She smiled through the closed door at the semi-stranger holding up the thermas cheerfully. It was hard to say no to a persistant guy, much less one who brought you coffee at the end of the day.

She let the stranger...well now that he has been introduced...Sahil, in. They had bumped into each other in the Metro, only figuratively though :P. She was happily sitting there on her seat next to the door and he was stuck somewhere in the middle of the coach. But from there he had noticed her, guys have a very sharp radar when it comes to such things. He wasn't very sure what about her caught his eye her straight falling hair like a black waterfall, or her eyes like a cat's full of energy and dreams, gleaming like green emerald, or her co-ordinated sense of dress.

Now if you know a girl or some common friend introduces you it becomes easy to well make an entrance. But how do you do it if you're in the middle of a metro coach in India, where lechorous men with corny lines have made it almost impossible for a normal sane guy to make his case, heightened risk being that given the skewed sex ratio its also almost certain that the girl you like is going to be...well not available. But anyways thats the second question the first was about making an intro. The step which even the handsomest, richest and smartest men can get wrong. But our protagonist (i desist from calling him hero for a certain reason) saw his opening and he blessed his luck for having roomie who was into fashion journalism.

And with his opening line repeating in his mind our novelist ( or aspiring to be one, really works as a journo with one of the dailies, does the crime beat, hates every bit of it) nudged his way to our dear lady (sweet girl, really hard working, but more about her later, right now the situation is quite tense, our chap is barely managing to break out into sweat).

Now when your are nudging your way across a crowded coach, you do cause some bit of a commotion, even if you try to be as soft as possible about it and a tiger making its way towards its prey (hey that rhymes) through high grass doesn't want to startle the prey. Luckily though our girl was on her ipod and busily sms-ing away (her boyfriend? perhaps, who knows, always presume its to her brother who she loves dearly) to notice all the commotion Mr. Sahil was causing.

So there he was standing in front of her ready with his now reheased over a hundred times the grand opening line. The problem though was how to get the lady's attention who was still on the ipod and sms (somethings can be a double edged sword). Well as god got to do his bit he did by letting a major station come, where more people got off than on. And the ensuing commotion made our lady to take of her earphones and look up. And just as the train started again and before missy could get back to her busy-ness the following things happened.

Sahil: 'A very nice adaptation from Valentino's fall line that they showed last month at Milan'

Now as dilli ki kudeeyaan are known, the reaction wasn't exactly as romantically inclined as our chap would like it.

Girl: 'and you're who' in a tone which meant bug off before the point of my shoe find how sensitive your balls are.

However, as stumped our chap was, he knew this was one of the few times he had seen someone pretty and had an opening line too. So willing to take the risk of his two most dear assets.

Sahil: 'Someone who knows what Valentino showed last month, someone who knows its a rather nice, infact nicer inspiration from the original, and someone who just can't help admit that its looking awfully nice on you'

The greatest of mountains move and even if outside this novel the scene next would've been the crying holding his crotch and making his way back in pain in this story the following happened.

Girl: Giggling, increasing in volume slowly till she reached the uncontrolable laughter stage 'ha ha ha ha'. Sahil managing a smile hoping the laughter was positive, that he was the undisputed conquerer of the first step in this bout.

'Ok i must admit it, that was a decently good opening hello, come have a seat'

Heaving a hidden sigh of relief our dear chap takes the seat next to her (readers note again god's hand here, morning rush hour seat in Metro, never seen).

Girl: 'This designer at the shop I work, Elvira's in CP, made this for me. How come you know this is from Valentino's, you're a designer or something?

Sahil: 'Ermm...no i'm a journo...my roomie is a fashion journo, so well. I'm Sahil by the way'

Girl: 'I'm Sarika, and looks like my station is coming up'

Sahil: (cursing the speed of the train before a realization dawned on him) Our station. I also get down here.

This is where the girl smiles back, understanding the guy's persistence but comes up with a disappointing line.

As they get off the train

Sarika: 'Am meeting my friends here, we share an auto to the shop'

Sahil: 'Oh ok, so do we meet again, for a coffee or something?'

Sarika: 'Hmmm, maybe lets see, I guess the conversation that started really didn't get a chance to take off and I would be real interested to see where it goes, but then again, going out with a stranger in Delhi, that would be real mad' And with a giggle she waved him bye as she turned right to meet up with her friends

And here we are, inside Elvira's a designer store, with our dear lady Sarika having saved our protagonist from a very embarassing ending to the second step by actually letting him in the shop (maybe she's a little mad, or too adventorous). Though you know with guys they can mess up even the best of situations and in the process making an ass of themselves, like spilling coffee on a very expensive dress...

For other short (not really) stories: call me smith

Sleep

He picked her up in his arms, the woman with tousled hair who had fallen asleep on the couch watching the movie with him. Her chaotic form, tousled hair half on her face half falling to the floor. She wrapped her arms around his neck in her sleep as he carried her to the bed. As he laid her on the bed she stirred like a baby with a disturbed sleep. 'Sssshhh' he petted her on the head, removing the hair that had fallen onto her face. He pulled the blanket halway up her so that she wouldnt feel cold around her legs, since she was wearing only cotton shorts. He got in next to her switched on the night lamp to read the book. she curled up around him, hugging him at the waist and a leg over his. He rubbed her back with his free hand, bent down to kiss her on the head. He like watching her fall asleep, she looked as innocent as a newborn baby, as royal as a spoilt brat and as pretty as a fairy all at the same time.

Vroom's Log 8 Oct 08

My dear friends, bloggers , acquaintances and strangers...the truth is out there...Vroom is confused and perplexed...

The facts/aspects are as follows:

a) Finances: While his school batchmates were doing a 3 year grad...Vroom was doing B.E. then Vroom worked for 2 years to well utilize his bloody degree while his frnz got done with their stuff and did their MBA...so now while Vroom has just started working his batchmates already have reserves from 3 year high paying salary...so Vroom is well just starting to build his bank balance...

This is important in two ways...one that Vroom likes to be the king of his life...so he wants to be able to kick his job any day he feels like...the monthly moolah coming in is not why the reason he wants to make him go to office daily...right now it partially is (given the student loan to be repayed also)

Also without moolah...he can't afford to fine dine and romance his swan the way he would like to...and Vroom being a Leo...doesnt like to cut corners...

Not to mention it also means a lot of potential women earn lot more than Vroom does

Vroom also likes to travel a lot

b.) Career Stream: While Vroom is an HR Consultant...he's a rookie and in the consultant industry...well 3-5 years is where you start gaining individual respectability and standing

and while Vroom is an HR consultant...thats not all he wants to be...he has so many b-plans he's written and more ideas bursting in his mind everyday and he would really like to implement a couple of them in this lifetime (early on in this lifetime)...which effectively mean that the next decade of life is going to be high on adventure...low on stability

c.) Girls around:
1. are not single...they just arent...every girl i meet is either getting married or is committed or well too healthy for a lanky person like me :P
2. Delhi seems to be full of daughters of businessmen...they are all out holidaying in singapore, shopping in dubai...their lifestyle seems way beyond i could ever manage in atleast the next two years
3. Watz with women not knowing how to cook....heck if i found it necessary in life to learn how to wash clothes, cook, keep the home clean among other interesting things like changing tyres, shooting guns, playing tennis why is it that half the women i know...don't care about what food comes on the table!!!
4. Balance: I'm many chaps in one...at office i'm the nice, formally dressed chap...at home i'm the clown of the house...humorous and well almost listening to everything folks say...including eating my greens...among pals i'm the smart ass, goofy ideas fun chap...All this takes a lot of diplomacy, tact and balance...i don't drink and go home...not that folks don't know that i drink...have told them i do...but i try doing sleepovers if there's a drinks party...i don't crack corny, horny jokes at office...not that i dont like too...but my office crowd isnt like tht...or prolly its too formal for the fun me to come out easily...This is probably the most important aspect...

So well the consensus among the readers would be...this guy seems to be harping about how in the next two years is not a good time...then why doesnt he wait till well it is a good time...

Coz...dudes...i'm young and energetic now...i have physical, mental and emotional needs now...if i could last another two years being a saint...then why the heck wonn't i live like a saint for the rest of my life...


And the confusion and perplexion continues...



To really follow the Vroom series go thru the chronological log:
Vroom's Log 24 Sept

looming between destinies

thrown between the fallows of life and death
the future looms uncertain
for all the things life taught me
i seem to have forgotten how to read the wind

the pain is lumbering from a past wound
raising its head and goading me on
to pick up the sword yet not unsheathed
and fight the battles that have been written by destiny for me

a warrior i was born
cant keep hiding always in a farmer's disguise
the blood must spout, the veins held tight
one of me must die, one of me must die

teri maa di

naee naee main kissi ko gaali naee de rahaa...main toh bas aankhon dekha haal sunaa rahaa hoon....

ek rickshaw waala....haanji...
ek car ka driver haanji
donon aapas mein lad gaee...tu tu main main ho gaee
joshi padosi kush bhi boley...hum koooch naee bolegaa

ek call centre ka driver...haanji
ek budhey uncle...haanji
ek light phoot gaee...phir takraar ho gaee
joshi padosi kush bhi boley...hum koooch naee bolegaa

ek biwi soni...haanji
ek naya dulha...haanji
ek office ki tension...phir ghar pe jhagde
joshi padosi kush bhi boley...hum koooch naee bolegaa

ek film actor...haanji
ek chotey shahar se bani model...haanji
ek to industry baidhi...phir log sochey tum sastey
joshi padosi kush bhi boley...hum koooch naee bolegaa

ek to duniya pe control naeee
phir yeh gussa jo andar rukta naee
yeh politician kameene
yeh govt ke baabu corrupt
yeh ameer baapuon ke launde
yeh gavaar driver
yeh office ki politics
yeh traffic ki sar dard
yeh contractor kaam naee kartey
yeh badhti keemat
ab koi kitni der piss ke rahega...yeh gussa kaheen to niklega
to dabaao jo dabtaa hai...maaro usko jo martaa hai...
yeh tera gussa...yeh mera gussa...
hum naee lad sakte asli problems se toh kya
kaheen ke toh hum bhi sikandar hain...
isliye....teri maa di!!!

hum bolega toh bologe ki bolta hai...
hum bolega toh bologe ki bolta hai...

joshi padosi kush bhi boley...hum koooch naee bolegaa

the bro code part1

popularized by the series 'how i met your mother' ... in existence for as long as friendship and women have been weighing heavy on the minds and hearts of men.

This post spurted on by a colleague who narrated that a friend of her's started going around wid an ex of another common frnd....what is the world coming to...

so here are the bro codes for immediate ref.


1. for those ppl who are unclear what a bro is...it your chuddy buddy...the guy(s) whom you trust. The following are the tests for knowing whether you think of your friend as a friend or a bro:
a.)A bro is more important than any new girl who comes into life
b.)You share all your worldly exploits (matters of the heart) with him
2. For an evening out...you can give your gf priority over hanging out with bro.s
3. In case you and your bro happen to fall for the same girl...only one of three options is feasible
a.) both mutually decide to hit on the girl and whoever she falls for is the lucky one
b.) both mutually decide to chuck the girl out of their lives...her bad luck
c.) one of you two decide to back out
in case you feel there is a fourth option...you two are not bro's stop kidding yourselves
4. If your bro was seeing the girl seriously or for longer than a month...you shall not hit on your bro's ex...no matter how comfy he is with the idea

If there are any queries on other aspects of bro code you can send them in here...as and when required an updated part2 of the bro code will be published

one more

Some new hues and tones

Couldn't help it...something i've been wanting to do for a long time...my blog on upcoming designers and changing trends in fashion, art and design around the world

You can contribute by providing contacts of designers, artists anybody creative you know and feel should be covered

Vroom's Log 24 Sept 08

To venture where many men have gone before...and to hope to succeed where most have failed...

To give it away...Okie the real word was groom...but since its more like groom to be eventually i had the option of using similar sounding words...broom and vroom came to my mind and for obvious reasons i chose the latter...

So neways it has started...three days ago dad showed me some matrimonial ads!!!

anyways i'm ok with that...in the search for the perfect soul mate...let the parents do some work also...

So i told him a straight formula...contact whoever he short lists...send my foto...get theirs...if things progress...will talk online on chat...if things seem promissing (witty and interesting) then move onto further thingy...

although if u look at this algo...it really doesn't sound like an enticing way to err...fall in love...but then in these troubled times :P (refer to my business plan walla post)

but anyhow i'm betting its not gonna be easy and i was thinking if maybe one of you would agree to be the bookie....we could have bets going on in the following brackets:
success within first 3 months:
success within first 6 months:
success within first year
success within two years
never...

it is for the bookie to come out with the betting odds...but neways i'll put my bet on the last or the second last option :P

oh and btw u can be contributors to the cause too....fan out...ping all the nice single women u know...pass the flyers ;)

a little bit of a lot

a little bit of tease a little bit of a play
a little bit of kindness and some amount of pray
a little bit of roughing up a little bit of soft side
a little bit of priceyness and some warm smiles

a little bit of fun
a little bit of wine
a little bit of embarassment
a little bit of swine

a little bit of pain
a little bit of pleasure
a little bit of the saint
a little bit of develishness to treasure

a little bit of everything is what makes things good
and thats why i'm a little bit of everything
nice, rude, cool, prude, gross, warm, kinky, cuddly
and maybe i'm a little bit of u

been making it simple for ppl to follow my posts rather than having to visit 5 diff blogs :P
http://catastrophonix.blogspot.com/2008/09/little-bit-of-lot.html

bringing ppl together....in real life

This is a business plan i've been pondering on for long now...and though most ppl don't like to share their b-plans am more of the linux mindset of person...dicuss and develop...especially since i believe that the only kind of competitive edge that one has these days...is their level of innovation and that's something hidden deep inside the person...quite hard to steal :P

Ok back to the plan...You would've seen ads of Shaadi.com and the whole bakset of ppl in that domain...then there are the orkuts and the facebooks. the main problem with these is...everything is so bloody virtual...

The only value add these things do is be a forum for ppl to meet online...thats not much of value add if u ask me....its still very very difficult to take these friendships into real life...you're never really sure who you are talking too...and though there are some very commonsensical checks most people seem oblivious to them.

So here' my great big idea :P ...have a social networking site but make the networking part a part of real life by organizing fun events...

I would recommend ppl read this short story: stranger in the city

and this post on arranged marriage by serene gurl

to get a better perspective...

and ofcourse if you want more details on the complete plan...u know where to ping me

original post on my business ideas blog: http://businessticktocks.blogspot.com/2008/09/bringing-ppl-togetherin-real-life.html

of guns and chalk powder

yesterday delhi was awakened to a grim reality that terrorism is not something we see on tv, its a grim reality we have to face too like any other indian.

And if you've seen the movie 'A Wednesday' on the same day as the blasts you feel that life has a very satarical way of moving.

But i disagree to the largest extent possible with what the movie preaches. It talks about how a common man holds the police to ransom by threatening to blow up bombs in the city if they don't help give him four terrorists, whom he blows up in the end as a retort to the terrorist attacks they have been doing.

My bro. was of an even more extremist view that an ideal resort would have been to have 20 bombs blow up in pakistan today morning in the heart of the terrorist leaders settlements that if they try any such stunt we shall reply in greater force.

What i believe is that the actual terrorists are just pawns, pawns in the hands of the rich extremists sitting in some plush palace somewhere. Our reactions of hate will only be used by them to fuel to the terrorist mindset and we will have more 'jehadis'. Look at USA and its famous 'war against terrorism', other than waste billions of dollars and spread more hate against it it has achieved nothing.

The actual war against terrorism will begin when we nip the causes. Illiteracy and unemployment. Education helps broaden a person's vision...helps develop the questioning ability, to try and understand what is right and wrong. And employment give him the ability to feed his family. Yes there are many educated youth who are terrorists but the base of the network the supporting framework comes from the rural poor. That is why there are hundreds of extremists madarsas all over india, pakistan and afghanistan in the remotest of places.

Now here is where the problem comes, the politicians can't risk educating the populace. Which educated person will elect goondaas to run there government. Hence been more than half a century of independence and we havent yet started focussing on educating the masses. It is neither a logistical problem nor a money problem. The problem is that the day you empower the masses they will not only root out the terrorists but also our current breed of politicians.

And we wait howling in pain everytime a bomb kills someone near and dear for the war against terrorism to begin

butch cassidy and the sundance kid

no not the movie...the reality...two days...two banks got looted...that with toy guns...don't know how they figured the robbers used toy guns...coz if they had figured that during the loot am sure ppl wouldn't have let them get away...but thats what the new says...ahem ahem.

neways...crime and criminals seem to be on a rise...which is actually expected...the rich do it in their belief of being above the law...and the poor do it cause well the law never did anything to help them so then why the heck not...and in the middle are many butch's and sundance's who see the rich doing it and the poor doing it and wonder why the heck should they not do it...

so dudes and dudettes...while u may be law abiding citizens...heed my words...be ready for the revival of the wild wild west...we may have replaced the forest with buildings...but that only means we have replaced one jungle with another...

may god keep u and ure family safe...

what do u 'need'

inspired from Cess' blog...google for your name along with the word 'needs'...quite interesting

1. Girish needs three years of solid training from such masters, if you expect him to be a World champion at the senior level (yeah i know my chess aint as good now as it was earlier)

2. Girish needs a match. The match has not yet been found, but it is out there tonight. (i totally agree...plz order one smart, cuddly, kinky, romantic feline feminine thingy for me)...i did delete the ('for this transplant' at the beginning)

3. Girish Patil needs bone marrow...i dont know about patil but i get mine from nicely cooked meat...crunch bone and suck marrow

4. Girish needs Grandmaster’s coaching at this stage of his career...naah now u're flattering me...

5. Girish needs an image branding overhaul...i agree bring on the combat suit...time to complete the military look and feel

the nuclear deal

http://businessticktocks.blogspot.com/2008/09/nuclear-deal.html

...and the political sell out...

the interesting thing which i don't get is...since all the fuel is controlled by the NSG...what were did the opposition mean by giving up our rights? what rights are they talking about?

the only thing that i can see as highly stupid is that why wasnt this done 5 years ago... we would have nuclear reactors up and running supplying cheap and almost clean power (cleaner than thermal)...and u wudnt have to think about load shedding...

and how many more bombs do we wanna make and test...since when did we get so violent towards others...i thought we indians only liked to fight amongst ourselves...and one british rule for two centuries hasn't yet cured us off that disease :P

thought u had me

http://catastrophonix.blogspot.com/2008/09/thought-you-had-me.html

in school when every body was cool
i was in my pensive mood
and some parts of life went so fast by
that the race was almost over before i knew it had begun
and you thought you had me there did you
well dream on...

when it was the time for the heart to flourish
i had words but no magic
and my search for a mate was so futile
that right before my eyes the world had coupleized
and you thought you had me there did you
well dream on...

and then you gave me eyes to dream big
but no direction to walk upon
and in my haste to be me
i had walked a couple of circular miles
and you thought you had me there did you
well dream on...

i cherish you as my enemy
cause you're also my closest friend
and i appreciate ure challenges
and my peculiar weaknesses
but if you think you'll ever have me
well dream on...

aloo le lo...kaanda le lo

There's this scene in 'welcome' where nana patekar is shown pushing a cart wearing a suit trying to sell potatoes and onions....well soon it might be a very realistic scenario.

After long long time i went along wid mom for shopping veggies at the weekly market...and ppl...prices have risen...when potatoes are at Rs14/kg and lauki of all the things lauki...is at Rs20/kg its no longer a laughing matter...well potatoes do go up cylically but the current prices are out of season...

not that it hurts us much...we still buy as much as we like...especially the fruits..we spend a lot on fruits...but if i can feel the price rise...there are a lot of people who must be going home sad faced...worried about their growling stomachs and more so of their kids...these are no good times at all...

the 'high'lighted way

this seems to be increasingly becoming my grudge blog...and my current grudge is against the people who drive on a high beam inside the city...agreed nobody taught u how to drive...and u really don't care for the other person on the road...since thats what u've become...and even if u did used to drive on low beam now u dont..coz u know tit for tat...

but why would u want to blind somebody driving a 100kgs of metal...at say 50-60km per hr coming at you...why...why ...why!!!

i'm jst glad tht there are still many ppl who still drive on low beam...not everybody needs to highlight their lives...thank god :)

Kya Karega Bevdaa

Since we have non Hindi readers around also...it loosely translates into "What will the drunkard do", depending on the tone it can also read "What can a drunkard do"

And for the great battle between Delhi lover and Mumbaikars...i'll say atleast in my observation this is a definite win for Mumbaikars...For the concept of designated drivers...i believe is much more prevailent there than in saddi dilli...NCR (National Crime Region)...

A designated driver for the uninitiated is the chap who wont drink on a given party day coz he's going to do the driving...so if like 5 frnz are going out in the same car...they take turns being the drivers on diff nights and alternatively skipping one night of drinking.

Not much of a sacrifice...a very simple way for those who don't have a driver to enjoy parties while being socially responsible...

but yet sadly sadde dilliwaale find it very manly to not be socially responsible...i've heard...."but i just had a couple of drinks" ..."oh alcohol doesn't affect me"...and these from some of my close friends...its like those smokers who say...dude i've been smoking for a decade now...i'm used to it...it doesn't affect me...

anyways i needed to blog this out because it leaves me very sad...when people don't realize that all it takes for life to take a miserable turn...is just half of a second...

its not manly to do the wrong thing...take a look at robbers and rapists if you dont believe me....it takes a man to do the right thing...coz tht puts a direct tax on u...a tax that u need to impose ureself...

The democrazy wins again

And the UPA govt. stands...but democracy has lost again, only the democrazies have won...with their horse trading, mindless bickering...

it is so sad...so very very sad...I didn't think i'd ever say it...but now is when one might ask...where is John Galt...not who...but where...

Miss Chitnis

While Keshi is flaunting her fake boobs on her blog www.keshigirl.blogspot.com :P

I wud rather talk about Miss Chitnis...Now u know my weakness for women...especially the fast confident suave ones, the ones who can move wid style and grace. Miss Chitnis is one of the lot...though one wud say she is more or less flat chested...but boy can she move...i've been trying to like net her for ages now but she's been evading me like the clouds go past rajasthan...

Miss Chitnis...is our house lizard (any lizard in the house as and when the occassion arises)...and i'm the designated catcher...that because i dont like ppl killing lizards...i find them sweet innocent thingies...wid those lovely big eyes...and they do no harm...infact...they eat all small insects...keep the house safe...and they have that lovely tail...which if it detaches dances for like half a minute...

So i go after them like a proffesional hunter...with a teeli waala jhaadu / cloth to grab them and chuck them out of the house...have been succesful a few times...have had to be bad to them a few times...but nonetheless...i like lizards...ofcourse don't like it if one decides to do a free fall stunt from the roof when ure sleeping...if only they knew that that's why mom and bhabhi want them out of the house...they'd probably stop doing tht stunt!!! foolish...cute lil lizards :)

The man

http://catastrophonix.blogspot.com/2008/07/man.html

stupid silly chauvinistic poem...don't read it

For the love of people

I had this quip where i had said...man is supposedly a 'social animal' but these days we're more 'animal' than 'social', and probably if we were more social than animal there would be more love than hate in this world since there would be more people we care for...

And when we talk about social networking sites like orkut or blogger i think they provide a wonderful opportunity for people to reach out and connect to others, I have been blessed i have met many an interesting people through here and in the process a little of me has mixed with them and a little of them is dissolved into me. And while safety and trustability remains an issue, some common sense and the lord's blessings allow me to be risky and trust people's good side and dish out my mail address and cell no. almost indiscriminately...

and yet i feel i have achieved nothing...The day i believe when a million pakistanis and a million indians simply choose to walk towards the borders...with the armed forces of both the countries watching not knowing who to shoot and how many...is when probably we will be able to say we've become social again...that will be a true festival like the breaking of the berlin wall...

I'd like to end up wid words that are conjuring up in my head:

fakiron ke ghar baarat naee aatee (the house of saints don't light up for their marriages)
unke janaazon ki shaan hoti hai (it is their death that becomes a celebration)
unki khusheeyon mein shareeq naheen hote (people don't gather to celebrate their happy occassions)
unke jaane pe aasoon ki baad aati hai (it is when they are gone that their lovers cry for them)

fakiron ki baat hi alag hoti hai (saints are a different breed)
woh kissi ek ke naee hote (they are not for any one)
poori duniya unki hoti hai (but the whole world is their family)
unke chaahane waalon ki line mein khuda bhi shaan se khada hota hai (saints have so many people who love them, that even god proudly stands in queue to meet them)


do read the book...three cups of tea...it is about an american mountaineer...who has dedicated his life to building schools for children especially girls in the remotest areas of pakistan and afghanistan

Stranger in the city

http://callmesmith.blogspot.com/2008/07/stranger-in-city.html

A short story just published on my short stories blog.

As always...i just write the words....why i write them is something even i wonder about.

Stuff i publish here is always in the first draft form...so it lacks the usual tightening to make it more alluring and crisp...yet i hope it shall be liked for what it say...

and i wonder what it say :P

Who messed with my confidence

Whether Shinjini got paralysed due to the humiliation she faced at the hands of the judges of the reality show or due to previous physiological problems...self confidence does remain people's most vulnerable area.

You feel like you are invincible and u can dare to walk a skyrope hanging a mile high up between two mountains...and if you're feeling like you're gonna puke any moment now...you'll get 2 + 2 wrong

and thats how life is...why is it that in a battle it is important to kill the generals...cause it destroys the confidence of a million men to fight without a leader...

how is it that battles have been won with lopsided ratios...

and now coming back to the current thingy...actually not the very show itself...was seeing mtv's show...on the job...this was sometime last year...couple of young lads were given some job to be done...they ofcourse were inconsequential...what was hilarious was to see the judges try and imitate simon from american idol in being curt with his admiration of their talents...

i really wonder why neone wud imitate being rude...but then i wonder a lot

and i wonder why neone wud let neone punch them on their self confidence...taking punches to the face is easy...the wounds are easily noticeable and easily recoverable....hits to self confidence could show up as putrified wounds suddenly and fatally...

so dudes and dudettes...guard your self confidence...its your biggest weapon and your weakest point...

witty and crass

there are times when one must be a nice bachcha...sensitive to the ppl around u...like in a mandir surrounded by devout followers...at other times one must heed the advice of khuswant singh and have malice towards one and all...

In this regard Osho also quipped...we Indians are too serious...and haven't learnt to laugh at ourselves...

though i believe Sardars have done us proud by being sporty...

My surname is Kohli...and it has been twisted around like a candy stick in the making...add to it...a frnd named me gilli in school which has...well stuck on...so here go my many names...kholi...kohli ki goli...kohlu...silli gilli...tilli singh...its gud fun twisting and playing wid pplz names...i have a frnd whose sur named as chawla...it is quite often that i refer to him as chaawal...somehow everytime i do it...it brings about a smile to my face :P

then there are some ads which cud be requoted to nice effect..like the polo...mint with the hole line...or was it...the hole with the mint ;)

okie now i dont want to hog space...opening the forum for ppl to add on...

and dont hold back...for this one post all sensitivities can be ignored....

Primate Hunt

The topic of marriage comes up quite often these days...people in my age group are getting married...parents keep indicating that it is an imminent thing (imminent = two year time frame according to them)...and i keep wondering...

I have been on the hunt for a partner ever since i can remember...though not entirely in romantic terms...in school i used to seriously miss having a good debating partner...there were plenty of good award winning debaters around...but unfortunately i was looking for someone who would focus more on fun and experimentation than winning...

The i have been looking for a gang of frnz who like everything from chess to poker to treks to drama...continuing on the theme of fun and experimentation...and mostly that gang also exists in parts only

So now i wonder...a romantic dreamer like me...it seems that i have been waiting for my swan (there is a significance to drawing analogy with swans, i hope the readers of this blog do know it) since i was born (guilty of over exaggeration)...and yet my worry is the same...fun and experimentative...does she exist...and if yes will our paths ever cross...

Moving on from my personal quandary to a more general view to the whole mate hunt thing...and dissecting it like an engineer there are various aspects to a person that we judge them on...looks, physique, family background, education, goals in life, views on life, habits, blah blah blah...not only do both the parties have to judge the other on each of these they have to be able to find out about each of these...and most aspects here are those that don't show up early...

Neways so given that is humanely inane trying to do all this maths...lets simplify it to a single dimension...do we click or do we not click...the aggregate of all the above is the intuitive feeling whether we click or not...though when it gets time to put a definitive yes or no to that question most people find themselves horribly confused...after all its a very long term bet one is making...a call option of that long is unheard of in business :P

And then for those of us who look at other couples and wonder how in the name of god did they find each other...i have been through three relationships myself and all special yet none supposing a chance close to the "i do" point...so i still wonder.

And those of you who have read my scrap on principles of seduction would prolly agree that given the opportunities there is much one can do...but for those of us who when most people meet say by their fifth interaction that you stand out a wee bit too much from the crowd (not in the same sense as stars stand out from the crowd)...there is always a dearth of opportunities...for out there is a girl...who one day quit her job and went backpacking for two months...who embodies the free spirit and the quintessential tag of homely (courtesy indian matrimonial ads if you've ever read that column quite interesting stuff there) an oxymoron in itself...infact it sounds interesting to make this a list of oxymorons...petitely strong...wheatishly glowing...conservatively kinky....spiritually humane...wierdly humorous...ambitiously familial ( i am sure i wud be jammed for wrong usage but i try to imply a family person with the second word)...femininstically logical (refer to the men from mars females from venus argument)...i wont complete the list of oxymorons am sure a whole lot of will get added to the list in the comments section...

so as i was saying...if you do ever find her...please claim an eclairs from me and do point her in this direction...till then i'll get busy with work and try and get that song out of my head "i'm so lonely...i've got nobaady to call my own" sung in the very endearing chipmunk tone...

inheritance of fear

Day before night at the station...or i guess on the way to there...something struck me...wanting to be spoken of again...fear...a legacy passed down...This fear that i speak of is different from the fear that brings cowardice...

this is the fear for ones loved ones, of one's own economic security...a fear of what the future will bring...which makes us take guarded decisions...and play safe.

It is said that for one to be an entrepreneur the setting is easiest for someone who comes from a business background or for someone who is a pauper...one has something to fall back on if he fails...the other has nothing to lose anyways (do not get stuck vehmently to opposition of this generalisation).

It is we of the middle class...the salaried people who find it difficult to break out of our routine and take that leap...held back by 'what if'...

Not that it is an unreasonable fear...yet it oft makes us be too reasonable with life...sometimes a little recklessness is what keeps the excitement going...

sometimes that is ;)

respect

A couple of weeks back i was part of an incident which didn't reflect the best part of me, there are various points of time in life when I have felt that I have acted like a jerk, this was one of them.

Post the incident the offended lady was nice enough to talk it out with me. During that talk, one word as part of a sentence stuck in my mind...have respect for your fellow counterparts...

Respect...when is it that a person loses respect for someone else...I believe that at the core of this issue what we will find is that, it is in the end lack of self respect that makes us have disrespect for others.

And then I started pondering upon what it is about me that I don't respect...and almost as if the answer was waiting all this while to be heard, it screamed, you don't have a meaning to your life...I don't respect myself because my life adds upto nothing.

And I think back to the movie made on the band Doors and the scene where Jim Morrison lies in a bathtub dead of a drug overdose...I think that was one another victim, a person whose life had no meaning.

I have now begun to look for a meaning to my life...and It seems this exercise wants to change everything in me...I can now barely make any conversation...I am literally afraid of speaking...for earlier all I used to speak was smart assy comments and sarcastic humor...if I take that away I usually have nothing to contribute...this could probably also be just a temporary phase...recovering from the after effects of making an ass of myself...but irrespective of whether the incident happened or not...the crux still remains that i'd better find a meaning to my life...or else a i might find a bathtub that has been waiting to take me away...

Principles of Seduction

While the title clearly states the intention some of these principles stand good when we discuss things like making friends or impressing your boss.

Visibility
This is probably the first and most crucial step. The person you are trying to seduce has to know you exist, in clearer terms your face if not name must be familiar to her. If she's in your class of friend circle or dance group or office or your building its relatively easy for that to happen. If you happen to have your sights on somebody like in the next office building or the other section or worse in a senior or junior class visibility becomes an issue. For school or college going people the solution is simpler than for rest...become more active in the institutes activities. For working people common hangout areas is a good way of trying to achieve visibility.

Introduction
This is the step where boldness needs to intermingle with strategy. One needs the right setting to say the first hi, sometimes...most times, if the person is not connected to you through professional or personal circles one would need to artificially create that setting. The setting must be such that a hi seems almost normal. Yet this is one place despite all the right setting one would get cold feet and there nothing other than self belief comes handy. (It also helps the hi sound normal which otherwise can sound like one is having a heart attack).

An introduction is of no use if it doesn't lead to further opportunity of conversation, either by phone, further meetings or even social networking sites.

Milestone
By now we have reached the stage from strangers to aquaintances.

Opinion Building
The next part comes where you need to make the person see you in positive light. The whole aim is to become from a familiar sight to familiar thought.

Myth
Braun, money or looks are what sink women.
That is a very shallow understanding of people. while these have a very positive effect on anybody I believe that it is the fun part of being with the person that incline or disincline people towards you. This is where your talents, interests and persona work for or against you. What the other person is really looking for is that do you add to their life or subtract from it. And it is in the early stages only where one must investigate what excites the other person and then build your case around it.

Safety Tip and My Principle
It is also at this point that one must find out if the person is available or not. Given that these days people get into light or deep relationships right around when they leave kindergarden it goes to say that there is a high probability of you mingling with someone who is alreay been taken. It is a safety tip to around this time find out whether the other person is available or not.

While it is to the readers discretion to agree with my principle or not I do firmly believe that one must not make a move upon a person who has already been taken even though one at that time may firmly believe that this is the one, if that really is so...leave it to providence. It is not for a gentleman to raise his eye on someone else's affections, like it is for a gentleman to thwart an attempt of someone else raising his eye on their affections.

I do also believe that while one may begin with a very prejudiced motive one must not look at seduction from a very narrow view point. Seduction is only an attempt to convert a stranger into an aquaintance who likes you. It does not in any manner reflect the nature of the relationship so formed. I believe if man (human being) became more social and less isolated it would make for a more caring world. And so it is our duty to try wherever possible to build positive relationships whether they be friendly, romantic or even brotherly (or in case of senior people paternal).

Making the Move
The next barrier is when we know the person likes us, thinks positively of us but we are not sure of the extent. Taking the relationship from friendship to romantic relationship is a very crucial step. the cliched arm over the chair move in cinema halls is actually a very nice and innocent move. (Sometimes like it happened to me, the girl might mention that she is feeling cold or scared making it totally natural to do the arm thing)

However beyond that when we talk of physical intimacy unless you want to risk getting slapped and thought lowly off I prefer to not make a direct move but bring intimacy into the conversation and get the other person's view points. Once you have judged the other person's comfort levels it is for you to make half the move, let it be an invite and let the other person come in and grab it (quite nicely detailed by Will Smith in the first kiss scene of Hitch)

Caution
Physical intimacy more often than not can be construed as a implicit commitment. Hence if you are not making a commitment it would be gentlemanly to check with the other on their understanding of the situation

And the last principle to sum up the article

Seduction is not Love
You may have seduced the other person but it does not mean they are in love with you...attracted yes, love who knows. And this I say because the seduction activity works mostly on the basis of showing ones best side, and love mostly means accepting the whole package. And since seduction might result in a romantic relationship there is a great deal of risk involved. And hence i strongly recommend that having made reasonable progress on the seduction aspect, if one is seeking a long term relationship to make sure the person knows your quirks as well as your positives and vice-versa you should know the other person in and out.

These principles of seduction more often than not are needed when there are hinderances in the natural flow of things. In general one would prefer if love happened as naturally as breathing :)

beauty

This article doesnt talk about beauty per se...it originates from the thought of the description of gods and godesses in our scriptures. How is it that most of our gods and godesses are supposed to be a symbol of beauty?

As i remember all our scriptures try and say that we shouldn't look at physical beauty and yet our gods have to be beautiful...creatures with the perfect build...

Probably what they are trying to say is that we should aim for perfection...perfect soul...perfect body...perfect health etc etc when they say that god has it all perfect.

anyways i'll leave this article mid way for now...we'll come back to beauty at a later date...it is a very wide topic...

Religion

I liked this line that dad quoted me from some where...Hinduism, Islam, Christanity etc are religious followings; religion however is a very personal thing.

The religious followings are just a helping mechanism, all the chants, the rituals, the scriptures...

While our religion is our approach to spirituality, and each individual chooses his own path there.

Another aspect of religion is the concept of guru / guide. And here another famous saying needs ponderance...the guide chooses the follower. Which basically means that the lucky ones will get to meet the right guides, for since when i am ignorant it is quite impossible for me to know who is knowledgeable...And that is why quite a few people fall for godmen across all religious followings.

As the Gita points out the way to spiritual awakening can take various paths. The toughest one being through meditative process...or gyaan maarg...Then there is the one where you dedicate all your activities in the name of god and be the hand through which god acts or the karam maarg...and then there is the bhakti maarg...where in you devote your thoughts to God as a superior being and praise him through chants and try and follow on the ideals set by him...this is the route which is quite deeply entrenched in idolization of god as a being.

All of them are quite interesting and would probably lead to the same result with each being suited for people of different temprament

My trysts with spirituality have been quite interesting albeit inconclusive...probably by the end of time here on earth i'll be able to write a book similar to my experiments with truth...for essentially that is what it is ....a series of experiments...

Love

A conversation with a young teenager reciting her story of her first 'Love' and breakup made me remember my days of school, college and those years when almost everything we did came under the category of love...and while I tried explaining to this little one that probably the term she wanted to use was really liked she did insist upon it being love.

Having seen my fair share of relationships, family, friends, enemies, romantic, lustful and some that can not be classified...i feel the best example to understand love is to study maternal love. For rest of the relationships add different flavor to love itself be it fun, or romantic fervour for it to be hard to pin-point what exactly could be called the essence of love.

The maternal relationship however focusses on one core aspect, dedication, devotion, caring, sacrifice. It essentially defines that to have loved you have to give yourself away as much as possible and then some more.

That is why the Sufi saints can talk of romantic relationships in the context of religion for the examples they cite don't talk about the romance or the lust of the relationship but of the devotion and sacrifice in them.

And so be true for anything if you want to identify whether it has reached the depths of love is to understand how much you have given yourself to the other person or the cause...

Pursuit of happiness

A very philosophical question that affects most people at some point in their lives is the question of the purpose of their existence.

While I have no idea who made the earth or put us humans on it...i do believe that each one of us has a purpose being here...and it is to pursue happiness.

A friend of mine said, you spend half of your day in office...work has to be first priority. Though it was said in a different context, in a way he is right...wat one devotes most of the time to should get highest priority...and since we devote 100% of our time to our life...that should get even higher priority...and the measure of success of our life...how much we enjoyed living it.

The past one week i have spent observing and thinking on this...and i think what we mostly do is walk through our lives without pondering much on whether our actions and our pursuits really make us happy...

People get angry...people get worked up...people dedicate their lives to work, to their children, to accumulation of wealth, to honor and respect...yet most of us don't know wat gives us happiness...and so end up achieving most of everything that really doesnt add up to anything at all...

this is one article...that is very generic...gives absolutely no clue as to wat to take from it...and probably has been spoken of by half a dozen self help gurus a million times ( atleast mine is free)...yet i insist...that if you do start pondering about what will make u feel like u have enjoyed being here on earth...i shall have achived quite a lot...

the one tip i can give u is that...the first three iterations of thought are not the answer (in general terms)...and when u realize the answer it doesnt require u to leap off a cliff or give up your job (or it might)...but suddenly u might find u can start enjoying life...

sex

Just that one word like religion holds a power in itself. Clinton almost lost his presidency and marriage to it. And as indian economy booms and more kids start living independently we have started being more bold about this topic and more experimentative about it.

But despite the mystery and aura that shrouds it sex is nothing but one of things we do. It is not a sin, not an elixir...just an act of pleasure and recreation.

Can it ever be tied to sin, i believe it can, when lies are involved to get it...when feelings our hurt because of it.

Can it be associated to religion, i believe it can, when it doesnt become just an force of habit, but an event to be celebrated, as osho says...smoking by itself is not bad....its the habit that is habit, even praying as a habit is bad...if u give ure full devotion to the cigarette while smoking it, or to god when praying it is an act of worship of celebration...when sex is carried out with that level of intensity it can be called worship.

other aspects of this whole matter which pertrub me are...promiscuity, casual sex and perversion. Is having had too many partners promiscuity and when does the count call become too many? or even if u have had it with one or two...does it always need to be only when you are in love or is casual sex as good or bad as involved sex? and where does perversion fit in...group sex, swingers, lesbians and gays, kinks and fetishes...

And since i can't begin to fathom the impact or direction of these on society i reserve my thoughts to only the basic principle i believe in, our actions should not be such that they cause emotional or physical injustice to anybody, and that sometimes one can be daring and experiment with life at other times one must play safe.

brining the subject to a close...it is but an instrument of recreation and procreation...and so one shud try and make it as special as religion and when it comes to our offspring ensure the best nutrition and healthiest environment for them to grow up in

is non-violence that important

Gandhi had called of the non co-operation movement after the Chauri-Chaura incident, saying that Indians were not yet ready to govern themselves. A movement that was successful and had given hopes to a whole nation fell apart just like that. Is non-violence that important?

As I see it now, I can appreciate what Gandhi was trying to say then or i believe must have been what he was trying to say. Violence breeds violence and that an act of violence justified for one cause can be justified for many other causes. One man's terrorist is another man's freedom fighter...

The violence we had perpetrated then as part of our free India movement has come back to haunt us as terrorism, riots, public justice (public lynching), morale police (shiv sainiks),or the frequent random acts of violence over petty issues etc.

While one may bring abouts laws on guns etc, that is trying to control the tools of the disease...it is the cause that we must cure...

BRT fiasco

Much has been said about the murderous BRT corridors set up in Delhi, however the keen issue missed while discussing issues which have become emotional is their intrinsic logical value.

A BRT corridor takes birth from the idea that a mass transport system is useless unless it is fast. Buses are a mass transport system but on a choc-block jam packed road they are as slow as the rest of the traffic.

A buss corridor is one of the ideas that intends to speed up the whole thing by saying that out of the whole road lets dedicate lanes only for buses, this way the only thing stopping them would be red lights. In theory this is a good idea, especially if you add to it ac buses which makes it convenient for even white collar executives to avail of this instead of travelling by their own vehicle.

However the current implementation as everyone has found out stinks. Primarily because

a. It seems that there was no choke points analysis done (refer to The Goal by Mr. Goldratt) which means till they built the thing they didnt know other than red lights what would slow down the system.

b. No plan B : which means in case of something going wrong like it did they had no plan to switch to and as they realized once something goes wrong its hard to react to it at that very instant

c. No Public discussion of plan: I am not sure of this, but i believe that the design of the corridor was not discussed publicly, the Linux system of keeping the code open works the best in cases like this because it allows everyone to find out faults in the sytem and suggest improvements making the design a whole lot more robust.

d. No Communication: All plans for the public require that the public be made aware of the costs as well as the benefits of the plan. As far as Delhi knows the plan is the brainchild of some dumb politician meant to harass them, Delhiites are in no mood to suppor the plan because their buy in was never sought for it...

so there goes...the learnings from the 5 Km stretch of the BRT could and can easily be used to correct the design flaws for the whole system, but for people who are right now too busy trying to save their own skins that doesnt seem to be a high priority thing.

going ahead the BRT is not the only idea that can make the busses a good mass transport option another way to do that is to make roads bus only for particular hours in the morning and evening. Like the BRT this is easier said than done but just like BRT the option is a feasible one.

Speeding up transport can also be done by encouraging car pooling (visit sites like carpoolmumbai.com ), private ideas like these should be helped along by the government.

Another note: I believe that the metro was badly designed. Given that the design can't be altered for the lifetime of it once it has been made, the metro has too little seating space inside, for a public transport system which offers most space as standing space and travel times of upto an hour it can be quite criminal to make the user stand while travelling, and this hasn't shown its face yet, but when the Noida to Gurgaon stretch gets done this aspect would come to light. I am not sure of the technical feasibility but wider cabins with more seating in them might have worked better in the Indian context than the American style cabins where the population load is quite less.

Jab We Met and Rise of Kareena Kapoor

Every other award show that came up on Tv not to leave out Femina Miss India had Kareena Kapoor doing the Jab We Met number, along with that per force the presenter (can't call any of the Indian ones Master of Ceremonies yet though we are getting close) had to call her gorgeous and a wonderful actor. I wouldn't quite comment on her being looks or acting skills, we can leave that out for the moment, but I would try and point out that her suddne rise in fame may have nothing to do with either of them. Infact the way I see it, the extremely well designed corset ensemble that she wore in the song Mauja hi Mauja along with the peppiness of the number together worked the magic.

infact if one were to look back into history even her sis Karishma had a change of fate when a good designer and some peppy numbers were able to reposition her from the gaudy low class film stature to some more classy acts.

Now there is no lesson to take back from this observation, except probably a visit for the ladies to the designer of that corset

The Elephant's Tail

Quite a few people have asked this...why the elephant's tail? And I have taken them into the depths of their memories and recall the poem of the six blind men, each feeling up (call animal rights) a different part of an elephant and trying to describe what the thing is according to them.

In my writings, that very truth holds ground. I know what I know and thats as little as the tail of the elehpant, and I speak from that little wisdome, hence after reading any of my writings one wud find it good to spend their own time pondering alone on the topics that make you scratch your head, find your own piece of the elephant :)